i wish i could be as nonchalant as paul when it comes to hating people. i believe there are different degrees of hate. a lower degree is the one where you have that initial gripe and get over it. the higher plateau of hate, the one i am currently stuck on, is where you plan certain scenarios in your head during which you can torture or kill the specified hated person. i am this way because when i hate someone, i really hate someone. i am a firm believer that there is truly a thin line between love and hate. and i also believe there is a great art in hating those who deserve to be hated.

during dinner at a japanese restaurant with alan the other night, we discussed — or rather i discussed, quite egocentrically — the different ways one could maim or murder those they hate. a certain girl i would shoot in the eye with a bb-gun, forcing her to use a glass eye for the rest of her life. a certain guy i would run over with a big-rig truck, severing his spinal cord and permanently ending his sorry life.

while eating my salmon teriyaki hot plate, i even came up with a new way to horribly disfigure someone i hate: amicably invite the hated person to dinner at a japanese restaurant, generously order them a hot plate combo, and mercilessly smash their face into the burning metal dish before they can utter a word of protest (who says bean sprouts are harmless?). needless to say, alan was horrified to experience this morosely gothic side of me, or maybe he kind of liked it. i, on the other hand, brought out a pen and a pad of paper to take notes.

i doubt i would ever carry out any of those horrible acts, no matter how much i hated the person. i would probably just retreat to my personal computer and have myself a good ol’ satisfying gripe, one that will echo in later gripes. much like this, this, and this.