my parents purchased the magic sing microphone on their recent trip to the philippines, and it has made for serious madness in my house. i can’t eat, sleep, or study without hearing one of them plug it into the stereo system, which happens to be directly under my bedroom, and start belting out the oldies.

don’t get me wrong, the magic mic is pretty nifty. it can store hundreds of songs and it’s wireless. but it seems as if every weekend my parents’ friends come over, get completely smashed, and then start warbling out notes that are way too high for them to hit. to make matters worse, my dad is all about the sub-woofer and the bass literally shakes my framed pictures off of the wall.

i think we’re due for a police visit one of these days. this isn’t the first time my parents have been rocking to the oldies while simultaneously disturbing the peace. a couple of neighbours have called the cops on us in the past, with my sisters and i embarrassed beyond belief when my dad answers the door in a drunken stupor, as red as a cooked lobster: “hey, man! wassup… nice uniform!”

and since it appears that i can’t beat ‘em, my only alternative is to join ‘em. yes! they have nsync’s “tearin’ up my heart”! i’m going to fight fire with fire now.

addendum: the whole nine yards has been reviewed.