I’ve always told myself as well as the people in my life that I don’t care about things that concern a lot of women. I don’t wear a lot of make-up. I don’t like dresses. I don’t need my girlfriends around when I’m upset. I don’t think Maya Angelou is the shiznit.

But I think a lot of that is just pretense. Lately, I have found myself more obsessed with my weight, worrying if I’m going to get Muffintop Syndrome. I am concerned about my breast size. If I had the money, would I ever get implants?

And sometimes I do wish I had a really close girlfriend. That’s not to say I don’t have any friends who are girls, because I do. I just don’t feel entirely open with them. There are things I want to talk about with someone who will completely understand where I’m coming from and how I feel. My guy friends, as much as I love them, can’t really provide that for me.

I think I’m feeling like this right now because I just went through something really huge in my life and I’m not sure to whom I can talk about it.